flip this earth

Accounts I have deleted, closed, or deactivated so far:

• Alignable
• LoseIt
• Quora
• PaperLi
• Ask.fm
• myspace

I tried to close Scrazzle, but it's still in beta and apparently they don't have any way set up to deactivate or delete accounts. I'm in limbo there.

I was going to close my Gab account before the censorship rug got yanked out, but missed that opportunity by minutes.

I was going to close part of my twitter accounts because I never play on them. I can't make myself do it yet.

Tumblr and livejournal can sit there, and all my wordpress accounts can, too.

My G+ heads up posts have gone out, and I'll be pulling all my G+ down probably by the holidays in December.

Since Lexxperience is moving to SyfyDesigns and we've got the LittleLexx 'billbored' back up, I may pull Lexx out of facebook sometime this winter. I'm very tired of facebook and have suffered real life security breaches with them several times because of their mistakes, and I may close those accounts after G+ is taken down. I'll have to plan a strategy on that one. I've been piggybacking off free hosting on social medias, maybe it's time to make a real website on a dedicated server with full tech support. I may start transferring material soon, but I'll be juggling other obligations.

Photobucket is a conundrum, hosting thousands of pics across multiple sites. They have doubled my yearly fee twice as they have grown. The content is too massive to move and reconnect all the link breakage that will cause, so I'm kind of stuck with it.

I registered a few hashtags back in 2014 and I can get them verified now, so I'm looking into that. It would be good for my personal branding. I can prove timestamp origination.

This guy keeps retweeting this tweet and it's driving me crazy. Not. a. clue. He's against the world banking system and the memes he retweets are both graphic and necessary for disclosure, but my original tweet tagged a movie director, so I imagine his notifications are looking a little funny, too. The pic of Scott Walker butt naked on a nazi flag was eye opening... Not sure how my aliens meme fits into all that unless it's a hint that the cabal is controlled from off planet, shot in the dark. I really have no clue. Or maybe he retweets and then unretweets just to get my attention so I'll retweet stuff off his timeline, but that's a jolly romp I think he should take full credit for. Heads up on the pic of the kid with his head half blown off at Gaza. Honestly, I think it's high time Americans saw the truth of what life is like when the uber wealthy stage wars over stupidity and so many lives are screwed, so I totally support that picture. If you feel the need to hate, hate on the billionaires who have the money to fund that level of crap, because most of us would have no clue how to even make a missile, much less want to live our lives doing things like that for sport. So here you go, James, Pinky just linked your timeline and you are very welcome to keep showing the world what the hell really goes on out there while we watch our TVs and booze ourselves to sleep so we won't think about how our whole lives are spent in debt slavery.

Ok, where was I. Live blogging at it's finest.

I haven't done this in months. Let's do this. While Pinky really hasn't been thinking about platform and publishing and has been a bit negligent of focusing on a personal work plan, twitter has exploded for me. I don't know if some of you think this way, but Pinky is front lines with the anons now. Pinky is part of the Q army. At first it was a bit intimidating, since most of my feeds on any media are vitriol and spew over the current administration, and I usually just don't touch that stuff with a stick. BUT. More stuff has gotten done and is still happening in the last year than has ever happened in any presidency. While people are distracted with the squabbling (I can't help picturing mainstream media platforms holding marionette strings for Punch and Judy), we've been under a state of national emergency since last Christmas, and most of America has no clue how close we came to an actual military coup. If Trump hadn't gotten into office, we'd have already disintegrated into it. The military was actually ready, they had a real plan they'd worked on for decades, and come hell or high water, they were going to step in and defend the constitution to the bitter end. We very narrowly avoided that. Y'all have Q and Trump to thank for keeping the peace so we could keep watching TV.

I've written in the past that I am a compulsive reader, and some of you know how many rabbit holes I've gone down linking things I would find here and there on the internet. Pinterest is my kryptonite, so I steer clear, but Pinky blogs have linked many official and original sites bursting with information. My blogs are read around the world by people doing specific searches, and I've had reader blitzes that dropped my jaw a few times. I'm not monetized, I barely have a real platform that I built and paid for out of pocket, but I really am taken fairly seriously as an opinion blogger when it boils down. All I'm doing is just being me.

So twitter blew up. I wasn't really pushing anything in particular, no agenda, no hashtagging to my blogs over and over like some do, no lengthy diatribes like many do, no trailblazing into forays. All I did was share what caught my attention, what I thought was important, and what I can identify with. That's all.

I've had months where I worked very hard just to get up to 70K, so 80+K was a surprise. I haven't been looking at stats this autumn because I'm dealing with surgery recoveries and I mostly just go bury myself in minecraft when I feel overwhelmed, and that seems to help me keep my emotional balance.

My engagement keeps bouncing up. I was always happy with a 1.5%. I went over 3% at one point. That is considered a bit stunning in twitter analytics. I know some people are really good at stirring up interaction and gang yap, but I'm autist and I am not a natural chatty person. I do compulsively read every single thing I'm tagged in, which on some days is pretty challenging, but since I'm multitasking so hard every day, I can't do all the click stuff and stay on track with life in general, so this engagement stuff isn't coming from me chatting it up. This first capture is for a 7 day cycle.

This next capture is for a 28 day cycle. I have never been this on fire. E.V.E.R.

Let's see what's going on. Why is my twitter going so crazy when I barely even log on, and when I do I mostly just share something that caught my personal interest. I don't tag people, I don't hashtag much, I just share something pertinent.

I have never had a blog post hit the top like this. The second one down is an actual anon project that went viral, and I was one of the very first people to see it start up and then get the tweet out from the youtube to get it translated into as many languages as possible. The third one was my usual stuff, but it pretty much tripled from my usual numbers. The fourth one down was just me feeling irked at how missing the point twitter was being with all the mainstream media interference setting off the flaming hate fires. The whole #metoo movement completely lost the point that Kavanaugh is going to help stop #themtoo, all the pedos in the human trafficking rings. Oh my god, how lost was that on the masses. Chain yank hate is so frustrating. Let's all hate the guy who is going to put child rapists behind bars, ok? Damn.

Because DAMN.

And then this. How many people completely missed that George Herbert Walker Bush's indictment went VIRAL. I grabbed it off discord and ran with it in a blog post.

Y'all can sit there and froth all you want. Pinky has bigger, better things to do. Pinky is being awesome because the mainstream is dropping the ball so badly. Click this next for an awesome cute page full of pink heroes.

It's not about left and right. It's about bad guys.

And if you don't know by now that Bush Sr is a really bad guy, again, blame the mainstream. All your dreams of the torments of hell visited on the right are going to come true, thanks to Trump and Q. All you lefties who think I've lost my mind, this is only the beginning. W is going down, too. The right vilifies Hillary, yes, but the target is much bigger than simply taking left and right down. They're taking the banks down. That is already ready to roll out. I've been hearing since last January that we need to be ready, have a month's worth of food, water, toilet paper, keep your vehicles gassed up, keep some cash on you, make sure you've got everything you need to make it through a big natural disaster, and you will survive the banking flip. Spread the word, tell everyone you can.

From gesarahelp.org

The Global Economic Security and Reform Act is a global prosperity program on the verge of being announced and activated. This program is backed by precious metals deliverable well above quattuordecillion of US dollars (40 zeros).

All 8 billion of the human population will benefit from GESARA.

And the Earth will finally be free to experience itself as the abundant planet it was created to be.

Few realize that there is more than enough gold to make all human currencies in circulation.

You can get much more super quick info with this twitter thread. FYI, the person organizing that research into information threads is a Q-appointed drops officer on discord. Front lines, people.

I grew up with a conspiracy theorist father. He followed every lead as far as it would go. Back then it was all in print or on radio. It was super rare to get real photos, especially in real time.

Nowadays, we are so saturated with fiction that we easily take for granted or dismiss reality, even when it's right under our noses. It's easy to scoff when the mainstream media platforms aren't spoonfeeding us vital information. They all repeat the same things and that's all we hear all day and night. Why might the people who own news agencies have an agenda to suppress news? We've all heard about water powered cars. Why don't they exist? We know we can charge our phones wirelessly. Why not our houses? Have you ever thought about how easy life might get if we could actually use the kind of science we see in sci-fi shows? Especially since we've had these inventions for decades...

Information is about to explode. The world is about to change. Get ready.




Wait, here's a blue pill for ya. I know that was a lot to take.

it's ok to look for more squirrel pix

click for neat article on squirrel photoshoots
I would love to do stuff like that

Directionless but very focused. Today I inventoried a complex tangled mash of player claims with shared trusts. I don't get paid to do this. I actually find it mentally relaxing to focus so hard on details. I often miss doing inventory in big retail.

I miss a lot of things. But there are new things happening. I don't miss that chip in my knee at all. I nearly ran up the stairs the other day without even thinking because I thought I heard the rabbit out. I had never been able to do that in the 25 years I've lived in this house. Neato. 😁

I've been keeping up with the Q drops almost since it began nearly a year ago. It was all so touch and go. Nothing like that had ever happened in any kind of political history in any age on this earth. We got confirmation yesterday that if we hadn't made it to this point, force would have come next.

I linked that to qmap.pub
There are redudant backup sites everywhere

We're supposed to look back on Paul Revere sneaking through with a message, right? Qanon is practically the Star Wars equivalent of Paul Revere. If you haven't caught that yet, you will soon.

The most important thing I've ever learned is not hating people just because they think differently than me. I feel like it has become normalized to hold up hating with esteem, like the proper way to froth and hate kind of stuff. There are many people I've come to care for across the medias who still haven't figured this out. If you choose hate, you aren't going to make it. I'm so sorry. I'd love to say it's not the end of the world if someone ticks you off over something, but yeah, actually it is. If you ever in your life believed in saving humanity, now is the time to remember that. Hating doesn't save anyone, and it especially doubles back in awful ways on our souls.

I used to struggle with being public about who I am and how I feel and what I think. That struggle is over. The people who feel and think the same way I do are coming out of the woodwork now. Funny, I know I say I'm not really anonymous any more since I came out as a real person, but you still can't really see me. At any rate, I stand now with the anons supporting our military through POTUS taking down the Deep State run by the Cabal, and even if people (friends on social media) leave me over it, some of the coolest anons on the planet have hearted, liked, and even commented kindly back to me in places and I have never felt so validated.

"We are Anonymous. We are Legion. We do not forgive. We do not forget. Expect us."

In case anyone doubts what is behind my loyalty to this cause, as you watch the news go sour over the coming weeks about human trafficking and child sex slavery, be aware I've been there. My baby was raped before she was even a year old. I have cryptically mentioned my escape here and there. If you have never experienced that level of horror in your life, and I know so many of us floating on the surface of 'nice' haven't, just know that between my best friend's vicious murder rape and being married to a baby raper, I am fiercely at the front of this war to take down the Cabal once and for all, because they have reinforced the disintegration of our morality around the world for decades in order to own us, enslave us, keep us lulled and blaming each other so we won't question who runs the prison planet we're dying on.

Save your hate for the real fight. You're going to be reeling around feeling sick as this all starts coming out now.

psyops

click for some beautiful pictures
scroll down the page for a list of links to more Ozarks pictures

Despite last night's live tweet falling pretty flat, I had decent enough returns on it to be worth my time, plus I actually enjoyed the movie.

O_O Um...

So y'all know I crawl all over twitter and am very familiar with its structure, because I use its library system constantly to find stuff. Since twitter is real time and most people on there are either half bombed on something or just too busy to notice (or don't care), I find all kinds of patterns in the seeming chaos. I see people knee jerking their lives away. I see puppet masters making y'all dance. I see all your mood swings pretty much go up and down and in and out on cue, over and over and over. I've blogged before how every year, sometimes almost to the day, friends of mine around the world will say almost identical sentences about their depression, which raises tons of questions in someone who has a bachelor of science degree in sociology. So let's think a little bit.

What are psyops?

• Psychological operations (PSYOP) are planned operations to convey selected information and indicators to audiences to influence their emotions, motives, and objective reasoning, and ultimately the behavior of governments, organizations, groups, and individuals.
• PSYOP can encourage popular discontent with the opposition's leadership and by combining persuasion with a credible threat, degrade an adversary's ability to conduct or sustain military operations. They can also disrupt, confuse, and protract the adversary's decision-making process, undermining command and control.
• PSYOP involves the careful creation and dissemination of a product message. There are three types of products that are used to create these messages. They include White products which are used in overt operations and Gray and Black products which are used in covert PSYOP. White, Gray, and Black don't refer to the product's content but rather the methods used to carry out the operation.
• In order for PSYOP to be successful they must be based in reality. All messages must be consistent and must not contradict each other. Any gap between the product and reality will be quickly noticed. A credible "truth" must be presented which is consistent to all audiences. Primarily it is a component of offensive counterinformation but can be used defensively as well. 
• White PSYOP is attributable to PSYOP as a source. White is acknowledged as an official statement or act of the U.S. government, or emanates from a source associated closely enough with the U.S. government to reflect an official viewpoint. 
• The source of the gray PSYOP product is deliberately ambiguous.
• The activity engaged in appears to emanate from a source (government, party, group, organization, person) usually hostile in nature. The interest of the U.S. government is concealed and the U.S. government would deny responsibility. It is best used in support of strategic plans. Covert PSYOP is not a function of the U.S. military but instead is used in special operations due to their political sensitivity and need for higher level compartmentalization. Further, black PSYOP, to be credible, may need to disclose sensitive material, with the damage caused by information disclosure considered to be outweighed by the impact of successful deception.
• PSYOP conveys messages via visual, audio, and audiovisual media. Military psychological operations, at the tactical level, are usually delivered by loudspeaker, and face to face communication. For more deliberate campaigns, they may use leaflets, radio or television. Strategic operations may use radio or television broadcasts, various publications, airdropped leaflets, or, as part of a covert operation, with material placed in foreign news media.

Everything that goes viral is a psyop.

• #plaidshirtguy was an unpaid impromptu individual act but was still designed to get attention.
• #qanon is a White House supported military operation halting illegal acts against the U.S. Constitution, if what they purport to be doing is true.
• A whole bunch of stuff in between is about yanking your chain to either awww or froth with hate- Body shaming, racism, puppies and kittens, pictures of elite vacation spots and high class cars, sports, popular movie enculturation, celebrity deaths- it's all there molding your brain every time you scroll a feed.

When you do your research, you find out how connected many of these people are in real life. They are related by family and/or college/business friends/associates (CEOs of social media platforms), they all seem to be working under an unseen umbrella (finding out facebook was established the same day a military operation was closed was enlightening, especially when pointed out they have identical goals), high paid celebrities working with companies and making political and corporate contacts all over the world behind the scenes, 'big' money/pharma/sports/manufacturing/food being run by political interests from outside our own country, and since this is all out there and easy to research, I'll just stop there.

'We' are little people. Most of us barely have enough money to live check to check. Some of us have nest eggs that probably wouldn't last five years if there were some calamity or illness in our lives. Many of us feel helpless, frustrated, and live our entire lives depressed, watching rich people do things on our televisions.

Some of you are not ready to wake up yet. This is where you click back off the page and go back to what you were doing. I don't want to trigger you if you aren't ready yet.

I like watching rich people on social media. I'm lately in and out of the upper crust gangs who say hello and stuff to each other every day, but if you'll notice, they never really talk. Just start moving around in these groups and pretty quickly the question pops up- What is their motivation? All they ever do is say hello and good night and post beautiful pictures of wonderful places (hints that they might even really be there), that they know each other (happy birthday shows up, but very differently from the regular talking groups), and platitudes that hint of covering darkness with brave but very fragile beauty. I really do enjoy their feeds, but sometimes something gets a little too obvious, especially when someone else retweets them in a row into your incoming feed. Is this a covert message?

There are several common triggers in the above pic tweets that people inside a certain circle know. Those three pictures are all about a belief system that isn't *cough* supported in mainstream, so it must be encoded. The first pic is a child/adult relationship demo'd with goats, which is an obvious Baphomet reference. I say obvious because many Baphomet depictions show adoring children gazing up at his face. The second pic is about Moloch, a god who required child sacrifice. When you see owls showing up in some feeds, they are rather obviously not about nature so much as a trigger for something else. The third pic is as NAMBLA as it gets. A 'bear' is euphemism for a man who likes boys or children. In and of themselves, all these pictures are innocent and natural in real life. I love pictures of animals, who doesn't? But as stupid as this sounds, they've come to symbolically represent human ideologies.

Not picking on anyone in particular, but this just happens to be such an easy account to demo. Mio is a real word (and the name of many businesses and companies) but it is followed by 666 (unclear whether that is deliberate), and something I've noticed about many of these accounts- nearly all of them say 'no DMs', many of them add 'no porn' (wonder why they'd need to add that if all they do is tweet beautiful pix), and nearly all of them never respond to anyone else in any way aside from their own following. They are clearly there to touch base with each other and nothing else, no convos at all, no indication of preferences or thoughts of any kind. Once you get used to the interaction, you see they are globally networked and apparently living in the upper crust, since they occasionally hint at where they are actually sitting when they take a beautiful picture at a table with a high dollar beautiful background. It's like a game they play.

I like to look up names and definitions and see what all is out there. This one got interesting.

So MIO, 666, and suggestive natural pictures about adult/child 'relationships' might really be a thing. No wonder accounts like that have to say no DM and no porn.

I'm the kind of person who walks right by this stuff because I'm super ace and it just never occurs to me. Thanks to experiences throughout my adulthood, my eyes have been opened and I'm able to see it all around me now. These things are not coincidences. They are very carefully crafted to look like innocent coincidences, but they get into all our brains. We become so used to seeing this 'innocence' repeated over and over that we essentially become brain trained to automatically associate some things with innocence until we are staunchly defending things we'd normally find extremely offensive. I see this all the time. It's very hard for us to believe, much less imagine, that a person we've come to put on a pedestal could be involved in something heinous and reprehensible, something that would make us feel very sick. It's easier to shunt it to the automated 'innocent' pile and walk past it.

Our lives are not a series of random blunders through depression. These are carefully crafted structured mental walks through very horrible things all around us by very rich people. We are virtually blindfolded in cattle pens with no way out. Our lives suck. Their lives don't.

Until you can open your eyes, you will never understand this depression you live in. You will defend your lifestyle to its depressing end because every day we are rewarded with legal intoxication and lots of entertainment. They keep us sedated while they constantly pull strings to make us angry, awww, sad, laugh at a joke, froth at a sentence, aww again...

BACK TO PSYOPS.

You can turn that off. You can make it stop. Turn off your tech for a day, or a week. Walk away. I once walked away for a whole year. I left behind the brain yanking and found MYSELF. And then when I came back I saw all of it through different eyes. They could no longer brain yank me. They could no longer make me depressed and angry. I saw them yanking people all around me like puppets, all of them responding on cue, none of them realizing this was happening. I started walking among them and around them, free of my own chains. I found other free people trying to make the brain yanking stop, trying to wake the puppets up. I found the counter psyop. I found the revolution.

This revolution is very real. It's worldwide. It's strong. It's taking down the rich people who keep puppets in pens with blindfolds making money for them while the puppets live sad lives and die depressed.

The revolution is going to hurt some of the puppets who can't wake up. They won't understand what is happening. They'll be angry and keep defending the puppet masters. They won't know what they are defending if they won't open their eyes.

Please don't defend human trafficking and child sex rituals. Please don't defend the rich abusing the world while they play mind games on us. Please don't defend religions that aren't 'real'. Please pray for the ones who will be killed if they don't do what they are told. Please understand what celebrity suicides really are. Please open your eyes.

We are here with you, all around you. Don't be afraid. Be ready. Get ready. The revolution is upon us.

If (WHEN) the revolution is successful, #relasethepatents will happen and technology will be unhindered, and we will feed the world. There are cancer cures being suppressed, there is free energy that inventors have been murdered over to suppress, people are giving their lives trying to get truth out to the public.

Get ready. #wakeup (You will never see the #wakeup hashtag in the beautiful feeds.)

long before I ever heard of the law of one

This playing card is from the the board game
24: Countdown
which I have in my house

In 2008 I struggled with who I feel like I'm supposed to be being. I struggled with my belief system and what I inherently feel is right. I struggled to express myself against a mainstream grain that had me rigidly locked into formation to the point of self destruction. I struggled for my life, my soul, my sanity in a world full of locked rooms, rules about keeping secrets, and masks we were all supposed to be wearing. Colors suddenly seemed very important to me, and it was crucial that I find my color. I kept remembering blue, it permeated my dreams throughout my life, and I could feel it was time to migrate somehow.

Always dreaming, never sleeping, kind of seeming I'm ok,
Touching no one, having no fun, wishing to go out and play.

Hear me whisper, feel me passing, wonder what they think of me,
See me fading, I'm just shadows, tasting only what is free.

No commitment, no surrender, nothing to pretend to hide,
Live forever, slowly dying, falling out of either side.

Keep me running, flying nowhere, prancing round a misty dawn,
Racing stillness, moonlight standing, floating wreaths of breathy prawn.

Nothing matters, worldly guessing, logic hopeless reason chance,
Sculpted meaning, mindless treasure, my place is to sing and dance.

Ever since that spring I've felt like if I don't say what I'm supposed to say, what I'm here to say, I will fail. This is one of the first really honest pieces I ever wrote for public. Bluejacky (originally on xanga) is here to be honest. Going back now and rereading this after running into the Law of One is blowing me away. (That is a simplistic link for easy condensed thought, nothing else.)

(I'm struggling with the format moving this over from original since the coding went through a webkit grinder during server move years ago, and blogger won't let me preview correctly, so I'm winging this. I got it wrestled into a box on the laptop, no telling how it will look on mobile.)

Stars on a blue spectrum are moving toward us. Ever since I was born I have been fascinated by this kind of blue, blue light, blue in nature. I even wanted to be blue. Blue skin, blue hair. I sometimes dream in vivid blue.

Sometimes I feel like I have memories of something other than here as I am now. I have tried reading a few new age books and am a little disappointed at the consistent romanticism, although I long ago reached the conclusion in my childhood without anyone telling me this, that we are here to learn, and that if we fail to learn while we have the chance we get 'stuck' or something. Getting stuck is far worse suffering than any suffering we go through learning to sacrifice ourselves for love. Respect and courtesy for others in any shape or form is more important than any ideas we get in our heads that drive us apart with disdain and violence. Appreciation and contentment are more important than acquisition and pride. Truth is good, forgiveness is better. Our learning boils down to whether we pick being selfish or being selfless. Will we destroy others, or will we become wise and puzzle a way to get along?

If it is true that we travel around this universe (and others?) in all kinds of bodies while our spirits learn and grow wise, then I know I have been other places than here.

Time and distance have no meaning outside this box that contains time and distance.

As a child I looked up at the night sky and knew I came from out there. I felt this long before I ever encountered the idea. I feel like this place now, although I like it very much, is a place I am visiting. This feeling is congruent with many beliefs, including Christianity, Buddhism, and atheism.

When I first was, I was joy. I was energy- glorious, thrilling, exhilarating energy. I knew nothing else. I swam in an endless world of joyful energy, all of us bouncing and rebounding, racing, feeling nothing but joy.

That is what being alive starts out as, I am sure of it. I feel like I remember it. It's a very old memory, one I cherish, one I miss sometimes, without really knowing this or understanding it. But I want to feel that joy again. I want to feel that exhilaration and energy and swim in a sea of joy.

Was that the big bang? Was that the beginning of this universe? Will I ever know?

Over a great deal of time, I feel I became aware of a little bit going on around me. This is me, that is not me. I bump into that. That is what being alive starts teaching us. We are not alone. We interact. And over a great deal of time, we learn that we affect one another.

We start simply. Photons? Were we light? They say we come from the stars, but I'm sure that assumes our bodies are made of the elements created in the stars. What about our spirits, who we are? Is there more than this body? I feel like there is way, way more.

Over another great deal of time we learn concepts. Survive. Work to survive. Cooperate to survive. Absorb to survive. Kill to survive. Rocks don't do this. Algae, viruses, cells, organisms. Are cells self aware in some tiny way? Is that how a universe of cells in a body can communicate and cooperate so quickly? Can we become more than knee-jerk reaction, more than mindless consumption?

Over another great deal of time we learn feelings and the actions they inspire. Loyalty. Protect. Help. Give. Die to insure the survival of the whole. We become a society, aware of others. Tiny birds do this. Some insects do this. Some plants do this. Basic training for everything from the least of these to higher organisms like dogs and people.

Over more time we learn emotional pain. Loss. Anguish. The absence of others. The idea that we cherished others. The need for others. To learn from. To love. To share joy with.

And over more time we learn the strength to withstand all of this, to grow into a new kind of joy that transcends time and place, and who we are. We learn to see it all, appreciate it all, and become- what?

What is next? Please tell me it's not some inert heaven or nirvana where we stop growing. I think we have that concept all wrong.

Perhaps this universe is preparing us for the next one. Or perhaps one day we'll be outside the cauldron of universe bubbles in an completely new way of being, seeing, and feeling.

I love being here. I love learning geology, cosmology, anthropology- the histories of everything I can see. I feel like I am so lucky to be living right now, in this time and place. At no other time in human history has so much information been accessible with my fingertips while I sit in a chair. At no other time has so much knowledge been amassed. We almost know the entire history of the earth, the sun, how long they'll last, the history of our galaxy, it's probable future, and we even now know how old the universe itself is, and so many of its secrets. We were blind like salamanders in a cave only a handful of years ago, and now we can see what seems like everything.

This will never come again in human history. If anything happens to this earth, all this knowledge will be lost. If anyone survives over the next several thousand, or even a few hundred years, what's left of knowledge will become myth and legend. It will be as if we never really existed.

Blue is much more than a color to me. It is something I once was, a state of being, information I don't know how to access, a strong feeling I'm not able to verbalize. Somehow it is part of who I am, and for some reason, it feels important. I realize this could just be a manifestation of my weird aspie brain. But I also wonder if my weird aspie brain is able to feel more than this box world we live in. I have a feeling many more people can feel more than they are able to understand or willing to admit.

Enjoy learning on this earth while we have time. Enjoy that we are all precious.

I've spent years living a double life, tearing my head apart in one direction while I soak up entertainment in another. I love to think. Over the years it's become almost stupidly obvious that entertainment is a brain training medium that seems designed to stultify the actual thought process. I brought up the movie Equilibrium in an old Autisable submission called Psyching Up – Becoming Liberated. I've made a lot of progress since 2011, but even back then my dichotomies were glowing like neon.

I think it’s really bothering him that I can so easily skate around morals and ethics in noncommittal ways. I have a few opinions, but I’ve already realized a long time ago that opinions can change and that having opinions doesn’t necessarily affect the reality around my life. In fact, I believe opinions are rather useless in most instances unless they directly relate to the way I behave toward other people, and we all know I tend to believe the person in front of me is more important than any opinions I might have. I think I’ve lost him somewhere in all that.

I can see now that he was holding space for me as I navigated my way through my jungle. I know now that I learned to dissociate, that I passive aggressively displaced blame, and that I didn't live what I instinctively feel inside is right. I spent many years pinging around in my head like a pinball, defending things I actually don't even believe in. I was trained to do that. All the same, it bothered me, and I felt compelled to sift down meaning before I lost myself in wasted time.

This spring and summer I've been catching up on David Wilcock's stuff. I had always liked all the people on Ancient Aliens and often picked up books some of them wrote, but I had never chased David around the webs. Until this year. Wow, I missed a lot all this time, probably the most and the best, but like all the other synchronicity I talk about, I probably wasn't ready for it yet. As I've been listening to several years of talks, I was very surprised to hear thoughts I'd previously had coming right out of his mouth. I've run into this before, where I think something and then run into it somewhere, and have written about how ideas seem to hit a lot of people all over the world around the same time, and I joke about how all I have to do is relax and wait for someone else to do all the work developing the ideas that I feel compulsed to get into, and it's amazing how many times that has happened. It's like I just think something, I'd like to know more about this or that, and pretty quick, I run into it all over the place. Weirdly, though, quite a lot more poured out of David that I've been thinking about for years and had never run into before, because I've honestly just never looked that hard. It's been exhilarating.

But another very surprising thing showed up in David's talks. He brought up the Cabal... I've been going deep on that for awhile now, shows up on posts going back a few years, figuring out how I fit into the world picture and why I might know more than some others, but then David connected a whole buncha dots putting logic together with spirituality in a world going down a political sinkhole, tossed in Corey Goode (so fitting that his website is down right now, everyone mentioning the Cabal is being ripped out of spacetime) and everything just lit up. The whole point to being here is on the line. Our long line of evolutionary development is right on the edge of tipping over because a few super wealthy people think they own the planet. I already knew millions have been suffering for decades (millennia) for the rich and their games, but I had no idea the portent of now.

I love Jack Bauer. I love Kiefer. I'm sad Kiefer is a tool, but I'm glad I saw his existence. In spite of fails, seeds were planted.

And this was my song when I needed it most during the hardest parts of my life.